This course is for the "Spice of Lifer" that struggles with both anxiety and avoidance in push-pull relationships, who are ready to call in a soul-shaking partnership, in only 5 days, without having to spend a ton of money on experts and gurus, or spend years in therapy with no tangible result.
Checkout Joe's experience of taking Disorganized Attachment 101. In this testimonial, he shares his appreciation for the compassionate and hopeful message the course conveys, as well as some of the artwork he created through the experiential exercises. He also offers his advice on how to know if this course is right for you.
LET ME GUESS: YOU WANT A HEALTHY, SECURE RELATIONSHIP...
You'd like to have an emotionally available partner, who passionately loves and respects you. Bonus points if your partner is a good listener, unthreatened by your needs, and knows how to express themselves honestly and openly in return!
BUT THERE'S A PROBLEM...
To experience emotional availability in your relationship, you need to understand how to communicate your own needs from an emotionally authentic place, without triggering your partners emotional defenses.
And typically, that means understanding both of your unique "love maps"-your way of giving and receiving love.
If you are a Spice of Lifer, that means understanding the impact of developmental trauma may have had on your attachment style. It also means learning how to recognize and honor your emotional boundaries in love, and how to apply what strengths you have, in a way that serves you, rather than depletes you and gives your power away.
But you're not a therapist, and its likely you struggle with knowing how to manage your feelings without getting overwhelmed, or shutting down completely and pushing away the people you love.
You don't know how to express yourself without feeling too exposed or too vulnerable, and so you might wind up sabotaging your relationship, so you can stop anxiously waiting for the other shoe to drop. You tend to experience relationships as power dynamics, thus, when you fall in love, it feels like losing control.
As a result, you fall into a painful, push-pull pattern in relationships that leaves you with emotional whiplash.
YOU MIGHT STRUGGLE WITH...
- Behaving erratically in moments of distress, or even with no apparent trigger
- If you’ve suffered abuse, you may offer unusual explanations or justifications for the abuser’s behavior
- When asked to convey details of your relationships, your story might be fragmented, and you may have difficulty expressing yourself clearly.
- You may struggle to self-soothe, and have difficulty allowing others to help soothe you as well.
- It may be difficult to open up or to seek out help, and then you struggle to accept when help is offered.
- You may view the world as an unsafe place, and have pessimistic beliefs about the possibilities for love.
- In conflict, you may tend to vilify your partners and assume your partner has a malicious intent towards you.
- You may be prone to severe black-and-white thinking, and struggle to sustain ambiguous feelings for very long without taking action to find relief, which might look like acting out in various ways, including sexual infidelity, ending a relationship on a whim, or picking up an addiction, for example.
- They tend to overgeneralize minor issues, assuming even the smallest disagreement is a sign the entire relationship is flawed and never going to work.
- The assertion of personal boundaries is received as a criticism or a threat to the relationship security, and so they may treat their partners with hostility, or emotional withdrawal, if a partner attempts to assert their boundaries.
- But the hardest thing for the Spice of Lifer, is that they usually attract other partners with insecure attachment styles, and so each partner is constantly feeling triggered, because for the Spice of Lifer, their attachment figures are considered a source of both comfort and threat.
- It feels like there is no way to relax into a partnership, or regard any conflicts in the relationship as opportunities for deepening intimacy.
- Because no healthy relationship can be sustained like this, for the Spice of Lifer, it proves their deepest fear, which is that they are inherently helpless and unworthy, and relationships are really just a game of power dynamics; control, or be controlled.
UNTIL NOW, THAT ONLY LEFT YOU WITH CERTAIN OPTIONS:
1. Read every self-help book under the sun, and spend hours (if not years) talking around in circles in counseling or therapy, spending beaucoup bucks and wondering how you'll know when its working...
2. Manage to accomplish a lot of insight, but still attracting the same kind of partners over and over again, failing to see a real change in your FELT experiences...
3. Accept that this is as good as things are going to get, or...
4. Try something radically different, and think outside the box.
If you're leaning towards #4, my self-directed online course, Disorganized Attachment 101: 5 Days to Support the Spice of Lifer in Love, is just the ticket for you!
"This course clarified so many things for me. Especially the emotional and body boundaries lessons. I have a history of trauma, and this felt like a very clear and creative way to address my confusion around boundaries. Thank you, Briana!"
— Mandi Cole, 33
IN THIS COURSE, YOU WILL LEARN...
Attachment theory and 10 Ways the Spice of Lifer sabotages their relationships
4 Essential emotional boundaries that take the Spice of Lifer from confused to clear, about the line between personal boundaries and conditions of love
Transforming trauma in the body, for Spice of Lifers
The truth about Narcissism, and Borderline Personality Disorder and disorganized attachment, plus the best treatment options
A focus wheel and guided visualization to transform the fundamental fears of the Spice of Lifer
THIS COURSE INCLUDES...
80+Page downloadable workbook+ activities and assignments
13 Downloadable audio lectures + 3 Experiential Video tutorials
Lifetime access to all course content
Access to a live, monthly Q&A in the private Facebook group
Checkout this testimonial in which Helena shares her major takeaways from the course, plus her advice, if you are still wondering if this course is right for you. Helena's favorite activities included the guided meditations and the focus wheel activity!
FOR FOLKS THAT HAVE TAKEN THIS COURSE, THE BENEFITS HAVE BEEN PHENOMENAL...
Students reported increased clarity around their own needs and desires, and that their partners were much more receptive to how they expressed them.
Students reported conversations that would have normally triggered an endless battle, or lead to the silent treatment, sparked a heart-warming connection instead.
Students felt as though they'd gained clarity around what makes each partner tick, and experience an increase sense of respect, admiration, and personal agency in the relationship.
Students also experienced increased clarity around what they felt was their "intuition" versus a "triggered" emotional response, which helped them make better discerning decisions about compatible vs incompatible partners.
Experience has taught me that its not complicated to learn how to emotionally connect in an authentic way, when you have a deep understanding of your attachment style. But, it can be difficult without the right tools, and if you have no pre-existing models for how to function in a secure manner.
That's why I created this self-directed, online course, Disorganized Attachment 101: 5 Days to Support the Spice of Lifer in Love.
Because it works.
"I have seen a lot of things online that talk about "codependency" and "narcissism" but Briana breaks this down in a very clear and non judgmental way, for the laymen. The activities she offers are fun to do, and I feel like I have a stronger grasp of what my triggers are, when it comes to personal boundaries. Highly recommend this course."
— Nick Patten, 42
AND THERE IS NO RISK INVOLVED WITH A 14-DAY MONEY-BACK GUARANTEE!
I'm so confident you're going to love Disorganized Attachment 101 that I'm offering a 100% money-back guarantee.
If you use this course—and don't completely love it—I will refund every penny of your purchase, no questions asked, within 14-days of your purchase.
Just shoot me an email at email@example.com.
Checkout Jitka's experience of taking Disorganized Attachment 101! Jitka's favorite experiential and meditation was "The Healing Tree," and she even shares a bit of her artwork in this video! She also describes the course content as "full of information" and "very practical."
Hi, my name is Briana, and I like burritos. Actually, burritos + a good movie = heaven, in my book. I also love romance novels and campy science fiction shows (anyone else a die-hard Supernatural fan?). I also love being my own boss. Doing what I want to do, when I want to do it. And treating work like play.
My passion for working with attachment wounds and personal development stems from a rocky childhood. As a child of divorce, I bounced back and forth between my parents, across state lines.We lived below the poverty line for much of my young life. In my parents, I had an example of hard work but constant struggle.
I became a high achiever to compensate. It served me well professionally, until my struggles with relationships in adulthood tore down everything I had accomplished.
In adulthood, I experienced roller coaster relationships, and ultimately wound up a divorced, single mom. Then, after losing my job due to budget cuts, within a six-month time frame, one after another, both my parents and my brother were diagnosed with serious, chronic illnesses. And the new partner I had fallen madly in love with– the one all the raw parts of myself wanted so desperately to please and keep – couldn’t prioritize me. When he left, my heart broke anew, and I miscarried, without realizing I had been pregnant. I felt my soul was split wide open.
As I came face-to-face with my greatest fears, I knew I had to find the grace on the other side, or collapse into a victimized identity. I decided to dive straight down into my demons, and wrote a book about attachment and grief. Ultimately, I found several other contributors willing to share their stories of grief, and we got it published!
Writing the book emboldened me to shed my shame, and talk about these things in a way I had never thought I would feel safe doing. This led to creating the curriculum for my online courses in personal development, and building an online community for support. Much to my delight, both caught fire, and I have never looked back!
IF YOU'RE STILL ON THE FENCE, CONSIDER...
If you had to pay $200 per hour, 1x per week for a talk therapist, you could expect to spend $2,400 in three months worth of treatment.
For a fraction of what you would spend on 1 hr in counseling or therapy (of which you'd spend most of the time going over the intake forms), this course delivers tangible results, in only 5 lessons worth of fun and easy experiential instruction.
IF YOU ARE DOUBTING THE POSSIBILITIES FOR LOVE...
All the things and the feels are possible for you.
More than that, its even probable, once you you decide and commit to living nothing less than a next-level life, and committing to the processes that will set you on that path.
The good news is, the tools you might need are relatively simple.
And the MOST crucial information that you will need on this journey, already exists INSIDE YOU.
However, learning how to access those parts of yourself can sometimes be a difficult task, when you've been taught your whole life to do the exact opposite.
But that's just conditioning.
And it can be undone.
Just as the brain is blessed with plasticity.
And it can be rewired.
Negative energy and defensive patterning that keep you stuck in a confusion cycle around her personal boundaries CAN be transformed and healed, so that you can RELAX into the brightest luminescence that is your spirit.
It is a process which will allow you to step into a state of being on FIYAH about life, and share that brilliance with a stars-in-their-eyes lover.
If taking a chance on pivoting in that direction isn't worth the cost of this course, I don't know what is!
THE DECISION IS YOURS...
You can continue to do the same thing you've been doing—feeling bulldozed in your relationship, while at the same time walking on eggshells and never feeling like you're needs are being met, increasingly anxious and depressed because of it...
Or you can take a step in the direction of improving your love life, by signing up for Disorganized Attachment 101.
And there is no risk involved with a 14-day money-back guarantee!